Wednesday, September 4, 2013

The Vampire Diaries Burning Question: What Would Mystic Falls Be Like Without Stefan?

Stefan Salvatore’s Senior Quote
The Vampire DiariesMystic Falls just isn’t small enough for only one Salvatore brother. It needs both to survive and thrive! We faced the possibility of a Damon-less Mystic Falls way back in Season 2, and we were freaking out about it. But, we’re equally dismayed about the reality of a Mystic Falls without Damon’s sour patch younger brother. With Stefan Salvatore (Paul Wesley) currently residing on Locked Box Road, Abandoned Quarryville, how has Mystic Falls been faring without him?

Speciality hair shop goes out of business

Without Stefan’s business to keep it afloat, Hero Hair, Mystic Falls’ specialty shop devoted exclusively to selling Stefan hair products goes under. Shop owner Becky Letourneau returns to her less-lucrative career as an anesthesiologist. No word on how Stefan’s hair will survive its post-quarry re-entrance into society.

Mystic Falls High Class of 2017’s numbers down

Without Stefan to start high school over again as an incoming freshman, the Class of 2017’s numbers are down before school even begins. Silas’ massacre on the town common further cuts down class size. Parents rejoice over the much improved student-to-teacher ratio, while guidance counselor Tim McCue laments his failure to start a school year with the entirety of the registered student body alive.

Caroline’s sleepovers suck

With Silas as Stefan not returning any of Caroline’s phone calls, Caroline needs a new BFF to vent to. She is forced to confide in Elena, but the sleepovers just aren’t the same. Elena doesn’t know any of Steroline’s inside jokes, makes terrible popcorn, and doesn’t appreciate Caroline and Stefan’s most-treasured sleepover tradition: prank-calling Damon.

The neckline wars begin

Without Stefan to keep the V-neck shirt fad going in Mystic Falls, residents aren’t sure which neckline to imitate. In the t-shirt fashion vacuum, the town is torn between following Jeremy’s example of the classic white tank and Elena’s go-to Henley look. An inadvertent Gilbert clash erupts, with things coming to a head when April Young burns all of Elena’s Henley’s. Damon retaliates by drawing unicorns on all of Jeremy’s tanks. His plan backfires and unicorn-enhanced tank tops take off in Mystic Falls.

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